Beachin it! (and an update on daddy)

Mom, Dad, Nonnie, and one of my cats headed to the beach yesterday. Travis, his german shepard, my dog, and my other cat are going tonight after my class.

This is gonna be interesting... the house will literally be like a zoo!!! My cat, Scamper, and trav's dog, Sasha, never get along, so I'm planning on putting my Scampie-girl in a cat crate on the floor of the front passenger seat of my car, where my dog, Willie, will be seated (he's a drama king and will kick anyone out of the front seat... poor Travis will be in the back, unless he drives some) so she and Sasha can't see each other, otherwise mayhem will ensue!


We are glad to have daddy at the beach house bc my parent's room is on the same floor as the den, so dad doesn't have to go up and down stairs. We're hoping this trip will help dad get strength back.

Dad had an appt with his surgean (sp) yesterday. His doctor said that this will probably be as good as it's going to get... Dad is weak. He can't do anything anymore. He can barely walk from our den to the kitchen, which is all of 5 feet from one point to the other. It takes him about five minutes to get up to his room, and you know how long it takes a normal person to walk up 14 steps - a few seconds. Mom or I have to stay home with him at all times, which means we can't go out and do our mother-daughter activities, like getting our nails done or having lunch. Mom and I wanted to get mani-pedis before our beach trip, but we couldn't bc Travis was working and couldn't keep dad company while we went out.

Dad's in pain. It takes a while to drain his lung bc sometimes it hurts him too badly.

Travis has been my rock. He saw his own father go through a downward spiral, so he knows exactly how I am feeling. He talks to me about it, but there is one thing that I get most upset about that I can't tell him about, bc I don't want him to feel pressured... My fear is that Daddy will never be able to walk me down the isle. I'm tearing up just saying this.

I talked to my mom about it Tuesday night, and told her that in the back of my mind, I'm already figuiring out who a backup would be (my uncle)... I'M LOOKING TO SEE WHO WOULD GIVE ME AWAY BC I'M AFRAID THAT DAD WON'T BE ABLE TO! What kind of daughter am I??? I'm terrified. I'm sad.

I want to marry Travis for so many reasons... First and foremost - I am head over heels, madly in love with him... He's everything I have ever wanted in a man, and I can't imagine my life without him... The second reason is that I'm sacred that Daddy won't be alive to give me away (here come the tears), but I don't want Travis to feel any pressure to propose... so of course I can't tell him that.

Anyway, I wanted to tell ya'll that I may or may not be around from tonight through Sunday... I'm taking my laptop, which has wireless internet access, but I don't know if I'll get a signal while at our beach house, so we'll see.

I'm sorry this was so long, I didn't mean for it to be. I need to go get ready to leave... We're taking off at 9pm EST tonight, so we won't get there til like, 1am. So we'll see what happens...